"lula"

I had just come from a grueling, if not punishing, meeting that started morning and ended til early evening. "Ended" here is a loose term since we didn't finish at all. We probably looked exhausted (another loose term) so the powers that be decided to take a break for the night and we'd start early first thing in the morning.

"Overwhelming" is another term used loosely and lightly in describing the work my team has to handle this 2012 and onwards. My boss, during this work plan meeting, was doing crafts as a form of therapy. But I guess doing craftwork was not therapeutic enough because he just about exploded and, right in the middle of the meeting with the VPs and some members of Management, threatened to resign from work.

Resign...now that's a thought I entertained. I had seriously considered this. I was literally getting feverish just looking at the work program WE had designed for the year. My boss, and even our VP, think the work ahead is "nakakalula" (their term, not mine), and yet... nothing. I've been with the company barely two months but it feels more like three years! (And I'm paying a dear price - my health) I thought the "Russians" had me pretty loaded but this was just too much!

By late afternoon, I was staring at the laptop monitor, not really listening nor particularly caring what additional assignments they were handing out in my direction. I was serious. I wanted to quit. But as I stared at the monitor, I found myself staring back at me. And as I stared some more at my reflection, asking myself if "quitting" was an option, another question came to me, "What if God quit on you because you're way too much to handle?"

That question certainly got me off my "quitting" thoughts. I am a handful. I am difficult. I can be a bit much to handle. And I certainly don't want my God (nor my friends) to go quittin' on me just because.

Yes, this new life can be more than a handful. Yes, the job can be a tad difficult. Yes, the work ahead may be a bit much to handle. But, you know what? I remember a saying of Mother Teresa that said perfectly what was exactly on my mind, "God will not give me anything I cannot handle. I just wish He didn't trust me so much."

P.S.
It's 6:45 and i'm off to prepare for my morning meeting. So I guess I'm staying put (for now hehehe)